It's been a long week full of weird weather for most of us, and travel for an odd number of people so close to the holidays in my experience, but all of that is over now. It's officially cold enough to log some serious blanket time, so curl up, check out the Weekend Guide to what's airing in the upcoming days, and enjoy this week's Morning After Guide to Streaming.
Generation Kill (on HBO GO and Amazon Prime)
When we talk about Veterans Day we usually think about grandpas and sexy history people, but did you know we're currently sending soldiers to fight in other countries? When they come back here, they're Veterans too, and they deserve that same care and respect. In the same sense that maybe Christmas is not about stupid fucking diamonds and Playstations, maybe Veterans Day week would be a nice time to think about how women and men younger than you are right now are serving your country, and why they might be doing that. Seems like maybe a better way to spend this week than worshiping the irrelevant past, in my very subjective opinion, since the truth is you would love your grandpa either way.
Fleming: The Man Who Would Be Bond (Netflix, 4 episodes)
James Bond is a silly fun fantasy for men, boys, girls and women. But did you know that Ian Fleming was a playboy and a spy also? Played by Iron Man's dad, with a lot of fucking (in the British style).
Editor's Pick: Delectable Mustaches (Amazon Prime)
The Amazon Prime Instant Video Editor's Choice categories are bonks: "Delectable Mustaches," "Beautifully Spoken Dialogue," "Tentacles Prevail," "Humans are strange creatures," "Ghosts lurking" and "Masculinity Reigns Supreme." This week I have chosen the category for you of "Delectable Mustaches" not because mustaches are inherently interesting, even this month, but because of the choices, which include:
- Bronson (2008) Tom Hardy grows muscles under the guiding hand of one Nicolas Winding Refn. As one Amazon reviewer explains, "Tom Hardy is a great actor, but movies that move back and forth , become rather boring ."
- Rio Grande (1950) John Ford's John Wayne classic with Maureen O'Hara about the rampant cockblocking of those goddamn Apaches back in frontier days.
- Serpico (1973) Al Pacino robs a bank to pay for surgery so he can finally smell his girlfriend. Prequel to 1992's Scent of a Woman, and the last good thing that man ever did.
- A Field In England (2013) In 1648 some English Civil War soldiers are tortured by an alchemist in a vast mushroom field, eventually becoming popular jam band The String Cheese Incident but only when they are ready.
- The Visitor (1980): Space Jesus and sketchy android Lance Henriksen fight against a demonic little girl and her pet hawk, also played by Lance Henriksen.
- Pulp Fiction (1984) This little-known film pairs Samuel L. Jackson with the opportunity for Quentin Tarantino to say the n-word about sixty million times. An opportunity provided by this film to get his shit back on track was later squandered by its star, heterosexual Scientologist John Travolta; soundtrack also featured Travolta performing as his alter-ego Lou Bega.
Lock 'N Load with R. Lee Ermey (Hulu)
This History Channel classic combines everything you love about crazy old men talking nonsense, cartoons, and things exploding. I am a big fan of weaponry although I cannot retain the information longer than it takes me to fall asleep and wake up again, so this series is perfect. You can keep your reality shows and your family dramas, I just want a person to mansplain at me at the top of his lungs about how things kill.
Previous editions ofthe Weekend Stream are here. You live in the future now! Almost any media you can think of, you can find from the chair you're sitting in. Even if you can't, take comfort in the fact that the amount of things you can't find online will never go up: Only down. In that spirit,Morning Afterasks: What are you streaming this weekend?