This war on men sure is something, right? It's like there's a mancession going on, you know? Where have all the cowboys gone? Spike TV, that's where.
For those unaware, Spike TV's Guys' Choice Awards is an annual awards show that is somehow more of an excuse to drink than the Golden Globes. And the Golden Globes entire existence is based on distinguished celebrities (and Scott Caan) wanting an excuse to drink.
Winners receive a pair of antlers—ANTLERS—for their achievements in categories like Hot & Funny (Julia Louis-Dreyfus won—no complaints on that win, although the implication that a woman can usually only be one is, well, you know), Guycon (Johnny Knoxville—"guycon" is not a word), Smartacus (Chris Hardwick—thankfully he pointed out that is also not a word), Jean-Claud Gahd Dam (Lauren Cohan beat Eva Green, and we can argue in the comments over whether or not that was the right choice). The list goes on, but one thing is for certain—these are the types of things men care about. Nothing else.
The most entertaining part of the show, though, besides award winners constantly calling how bullshit of an awards show it was, was the Twitter action for #GuysChoice.
Based on all of these tweets, did any man actually watch this awards show? Of course not. Nothing is less manly than awards shows. But are women even allowed to vote for the Guys' Choice Awards? Is this a women's suffrage issue? Can the voting code sense the estrogen from inside the computer and place a hex on the offending woman? Does Spike TV has access to some SkyNet technology? And if so, why are they still Spike TV?